How much did adopting a child cost you?
Hi all,
My wife and I have been trying to have a child for over 3 years. While she has been pregnant twice, both experiences were quite traumatic for both of us. Her first pregnancy ended with a miscarriage at 5 months, and the second pregnancy was an ectopic pregnancy which landed her in the emergency room. We both really want a child, especially a child of our own, but I just don’t want to cause any more physical and emotional distress on my wife. We have decided to look at the alternative which is adoption. Primarily we’re only interested in the adoption of a new born. We began to do some research and the cost of an adoption seems staggering! We’re not interested in an international adoption either. I would like to get some feedback from other couples which have successfully adopted a new born. How much did it actually cost you (after the tax credit and any employer adoption benefits). Was it really around K!!
I can understand the attorney fees and medical costs for the birth mother, but k? It also seems that the adoption process is quite complicated (home study, back ground check, family history, etc), I do understand why those things are required, but I would assume those things should be required of ANY couple wanting to have a child, not just adoptive parents.
Anyway, I am really interested to see how much adopting a new born ended up costing you.
Thanks so much for your feedback! Our combined income is around 0K a year, we own two homes (fully paid), so we’re not poor, and though we really want a child, we don’t want to end up declaring bankruptcy to have one.
Thanks so much!
Jason & Mindy
@PIP – If you haven’t adopted or even intend to adopt, you’re not qualified to answer my question, nor am I interested in your opinion. Your "answer" had nothing to do with my question. In the future, I would recommend that you read an individual’s question carefully before answering.
@Toreejon – Much like the other person who "answered" my question. I am sorry that you had a bad experience as an adoptee, but no where in my question do I ask for an adoptee’s opinion. I have friends who are adopted and have no longing for their natural mother and father.
@Sunny – I did not ask for your opinion on adoption. I wanted answers from adoptive parents. The fact that we really want a child of our own, doesn’t take anything away from us completely loving an adopted child. This so called "bond" between child and natural parents is a myth. This bond is developed as the result of the relationship with the child’s parents (i.e. the parents who raised the child). There is absolutely no evidence that suggests there is a "natural" bond between a child and a natural parent if the child was not raised by those parents. As to your point of DNA, it is completely irrelevant. Unless you’re Einstein or Mozart, your DNA is nothing to write home about. I can’t believe you equate adopting a child with that of buying a car. You need some serious help. Adoption is a very unselfish act. We want to adopt not to make up for the "child we might have had" but to rather to share or love and blessings with a child in need. We don’t HAVE to adopt, we want to.