Should I tell my daughter about my money problems since it is caused by not receiving child support?
When my ex and I split up and child support was set up, I made a budget that fit the income. After a few years, my ex quit his job to get out of child support. After finding where he was working and turning it in, he would quit again to move to another job. I used my credit cards to fill in the missing money thinking i would pay it off when he started to pay again. Well that didn’t happen. Now I am filing bankruptcy after cutting everything we used to do out. I will be able to pay the bills with my own income when this is through. My daughter sees that I am stressed and hears the collections calls. Do I tell her the whole truth? I don’t want to seem like a complete failure in her eyes like i can’t handle money and she lost everything she used to do because of my incompetence. We wouldn’t be this bad off if he didn’t run from his responsibilities. But I don’t want to make her hate her dad.
She is 13 years old. Her Dad rarely sees her because it is now his turn to enjoy life since he started to have kids at 20(he is 42 now- and that is a quote from him) He has a 21 year old son from a first marriage living with him who he makes pay all the bills in their house. That son is going to move in with me next month because he has been wanting to go to college but hasnt been able to since all his money goes toward the household expenses(he works 60 hours a week at a little more than minimum wage and he is not my biological child)
This is for the people who asked how much he was in her life and how old she was.
Do not tell her the reason for your financial difficulties. This is a burden she should not have to bear. Lots of people have money problems in this economy, especially single-parent households. Just tell her that even though money is tight, her needs will always be taken care of and she doesn’t have to worry. This is all a child needs to hear.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:24 pmAnd what would you do if he were hit by a bus tomorrow.
If you can’t afford to support your child you shouldn’t have one.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:24 pmNO Do not tell you daughter about these money problems. She should not know about it- it is not her problem. There is no need to stress her out or upset her because her dad is not helping pay for her. She does not need to know. It will only hurt her.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:24 pmI am in the same boat as are a lot of people right now I am also not getting support and I am filing Bankruptcy I think lol …{ long story there but my lawyer I just paid to do the bankruptcy was arrested 4 theft and fraud and now I dont know what to do there}..However you didn’t say your child’s age and that would say it all but I can tell you my son is 12 and he doesn’t know anything about it cause he is a kid and I dont want him to be involved in a grown situation ..Your daughter loves you and it would probably do nothing but worry her so I wouldn’t tell her about it unless its Absolutely necessary
July 8th, 2010 at 9:24 pmYour child shouldn’t have to feel that stress. You could tell her things are tight but everything will be fine…like it always has been.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:24 pmDon’t give her the details.