Did you have to file for bankruptcy after your divorce?
I’m in a divorce that now hit the 4 thousand dollar mark with no end in site. When my husband walked out on us he left me in a big mess. I was a stay at home mom and I hadn’t worked in almost 3 years. He left us with no money or anything. He gets to go live with his rich family who are paying for EVERYTHING and he already told me he has the resources to drag this out till he crushes me financially. Honestly he’s doing a good job.
I’m getting help from the government but it’s not enough to take care of me and two kids. I’m several thousand dollars in debt now and that’s only going to get worse. Should I let my attorney bills pile up and keep adding to my credit card debt and file bankruptcy or should I try to dig out?
What would you do? I feel so lost right now.
My husband won’t agree on ANYTHING. I can’t tell him anything without it costing several hundred dollars to have the attorneys talk for us.
He doesn’t have to pay child support because he doens’t have a job .We live 5 states away and he wants the kids every other month! My babies are 5 months old and 23 months old and he told me before he left he could care less if they live or die. He’s only using them to hurt me.
Avoid bankruptcy if you can. Even if you get into debt, as long as you can consolidate and meet monthly payments, keep it up. When you get spousal support, you should be helped, as well as child support. Most people file for bankruptcy because they were already in tens of thousands of dollars in debt as a couple, so when they separate, they can no longer afford the house or cars or toys. if all your bills are accrued afterwards, such as in attorneys, you should be able to work something out with them like a payment schedule. Talk to a financial advisor about the situation of your finances. there are many that will offer free consultations and advise you on the proper steps to take.
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmWhy hasn’t your lawyer secured appropriate temporary spousal and child support?
And is there anything you can agree on with him? The reason divorces become so costly is because everything suggested by one person is opposed by the other person.
Let him have what he wants and be done with the whole mess. (If you can… )
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmIs his name on the bills
BANKRUPT thats the only way !
GL
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmListen to me. Let it pile up and then file for bankruptcy. Think about this a minute. "Who the hell really cares that you went bankrupt?" It is in your best interest to do it. So what, that it remains on your credit report for 10 years. It only means that you can’t go bankrupt again for a least 7 years and that the notation on your credit report stays for 10 years. Big deal. Your slate will be clean and you get to start over again. Btw, credit card companies will be sending you new cards in no time. You will be soooo relieved and still be in the game. Good luck.
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmDon’t file for bankruptcy. There is no advantage in it for you. It will not put money in your pocket and that is what you need right now. Don’t worry about the lawyer and other bills until after you settle your divorce. If you can under pay the minimum on your credit card that is better than paying nothing. But don’t keep running it up. Avoid using it as much as you can. If he has money hammer the crap out of him. Tell your lawyer you need him/her to be agressive and get an alimony and child support settlement ASAP. He/she needs to plead the desperation of you situation to the judge.
Good luck and hang in there.
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmI was forced into bankruptcy after my divorce. 1985…$65,000…with nothing to show for it. No house, car, nothing.
I survived.
I worked, did not incur any new debt after the bankruptcy and after about two years I got a secured credit card.
Slowly my credit built up and I lived happily ever after.
Do not be nice about money with your ex. Make him pay his share. Business, is business.
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pmDo you live in a community property state? How about child support for the children? Did the two of you run these debts up together or did he do them on his own without your consent or knowledge? Do not add to your credit card debt if it can be avoided. Go to the state and file a petition to collect child support. Once you get an order for child support from the courts, he will have to work or his parents can pay his child support. How many children do you have? If they are his, he WILL have to pay. Write letters to these creditors informing them that they are also his bills and where to locate him at his parents home. Give them his address there. You must be prepared for a battle. If filing is the only way you and your children can survive, then go to legal aid and DO it. It is a legal way out for people who are really strapped and see no other way.In your case, raising your children should get priority! Feel no guilt about taking the legal relief the law provides. The creditors will be forced to go after him for this debt. Hold your head up, being a stay at home mom is REAL work! Get the emotional support of relatives right now. I am here to talk anytime. I raised three boys myself and know how hard it is on your own. May God bless you and your precious little ones.
It does not matter if he is 5 states away! Once a judgment is in effect, he will be ordered to find a job. If he does not, he may go to work release, or they will take his income tax return, or they may even jail him. You do not have to turn the children over to him every other month unless there is a court order! Usually the children get to spend summers with the non custodial parent. If there is no court order, do what you think is in their best interest.
April 10th, 2010 at 7:01 pm